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When We Talk About Love: Learning from Experience, Innovating for the Future

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Nick Pearce |  Lisa Appignanesi |  Brett Kahr |  Susanna Rustin |  Margaret Rustin |  Sheila Hollins |  Andrew Balfour |  Claire Tyler |  Paul Burstow |  Reenee Singh |  Philip and Carolyn Cowan |  Chris Clulow |   3 more....
9 Hours 23 Minutes
Audio and Video
Nov 30, 2018
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Media Type:
Digital Recording
Never expires.


This digital recording of the Tavistock Relationships 2018 conference explores what we mean when we talk about love, and consider the nature of intimate relationships at this particular point in the 21st century.

We look at what are the pressures brought to bear on the couple relationship in the age of reality television programmes such as Love Island? Is this just a show designed to hook viewers or does it say something about contemporary love relations? How can we think clinically about the effects of social media and the pressures young people feel?

Lisa Appignanesi talks about her latest book, Everyday Madness: On Grief, Anger, Loss and Love, which weaves an exploration of psychoanalytic approaches to mourning into a moving memoir of bereavement.

Couple psychoanalytic psychotherapy has been shown to be effective in addressing the key social problems of our time, and can help to alleviate distress in children as well as their parents.

We look at the context of social and family policy from the inception of the welfare state in post-war Britain to now, with a focus on evidence and the links between family functioning and mental health. 

Consideration is given to the institution’s ground-breaking developments in analytic work with couples, including the therapeutic opportunities of the triangular setting of couple therapy, and the centrality of working with the couple’s enacted experience in the room. A strong focus on clinical practice will explore clinical applications of analytic work with couples.

Presentations will draw from two new Tavistock Relationships books, which will be launched on the day: A Couple State of Mind: Psychoanalysis of Couples by Mary Morgan, and Engaging Couples: New Directions in Therapeutic Work with Families, edited by Andrew Balfour, Christopher Clulow and Kate Thompson.




This online program is worth 6 hours CPD.


Nick Pearce's Profile

Nick Pearce Related seminars and products


Nick leads the Institute for Policy Research (IPR) across the range of its research, teaching, policy programmes and public engagement activity. Nick has extensive experience in policy research & government policymaking. He is an author & regular commentator on public policy in print media, & writes on a wide range of issues, from contemporary British politics, public service & welfare state reform, to the changing nature of political leadership.

Nick was formerly Director of the Institute for Public Policy Research (IPPR), where he led a team of 45 staff producing public policy research in the key areas of public services, economic reform, the welfare state, migration, energy & environment & politics & power. He co-edited the journal of ideas Juncture.

Nick was also Head of the No10 Downing St. Policy Unit between 2008 & 2010, with responsibility for the formulation of policy advice to the Prime Minister. He led and managed the work of the Prime Minister’s 13 policy advisers, coordinating policy development & liaising with external stakeholders.

He has also worked as special advisor in the Home Office, Cabinet Office & former Department for Education and Employment. Nick was formerly chair of the advisory board to the UK Chief Scientist's Foresight Programme & served on the Equalities Review & the Teaching & Learning 2020 Review. He is an honorary fellow of the Royal Institute of British Architects & is a member of the Foreign & Commonwealth Office's Diplomatic Excellence Panel. He is chair of trustees at Tavistock Relationships.

Lisa Appignanesi's Profile

Lisa Appignanesi Related seminars and products

Lisa Appignanesi OBE is an award-winning writer, novelist, cultural commentator and Chair of the Royal Society of Literature.

Her new book is Everyday Madness: On Grief, Anger, Loss and Love. Her other prize-winning books include Trials of Passion: Crimes in the Name of Love and Madness,  All About Love: Anatomy of an Unruly Emotion ,  Mad Bad and Sad: A History of Women and the Mind Doctors from 1800; Freud’s Women (with John Forrester); a biographical portrait of Simone de Beauvoir and The Cabaret. She is also the author of an acclaimed family memoir, Losing the Dead, and nine novels, including The Memory Man and Paris Requiem.

She was for many years Chair of the Freud Museum London and President of English PEN. A former Deputy Director of London’s Institute of Contemporary Arts, she was the Chair of the 2018 Man Booker International Prize. She is a Visiting Professor in Literature and Medical Humanities at King’s College London and was made a Chevalier de l’Ordre des Arts et des Lettres in recognition of her contribution to literature. She was awarded the OBE for services to literature in 2013.  

She has contributed to many radio and television programmes, and has written for The Guardian, The Observer, The Telegraph and now the New York Review of Books. 

She was born in Poland, brought up in Paris and Montreal, came to the UK as a graduate student and lives in London.  She has two children, the filmmaker Josh Appignanesi, and the political philosopher and historian, Katrina Forrester.

Brett Kahr's Profile

Brett Kahr Related seminars and products


Brett has worked in the mental health field for over thirty-five years.  He is Senior Fellow at Tavistock Relationships, Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London, and also Senior Clinical Research Fellow in Psychotherapy and Mental Health at the Centre for Child Mental Health, as well as Consultant in Psychology to The Bowlby Centre, also in London.  He holds registration as a psychotherapist of both adults and, also couples in the British Psychoanalytic Council and the United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy.

A former Chair of both the Society of Couple Psychoanalytic Psychotherapists and of the British Society of Couple Psychotherapists and Counsellors, he serves as Series Co-editor of “The Library of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis”.  An experienced teacher, he has lectured on psychoanalysis, psychotherapy, psychopathology, and related subjects since 1979, he has held the Richard William Hopkins Memorial Scholar at Cornell University, a University Fellowship at Yale University, and has been a Visiting Scholar at Emory University.

He currently teaches in the Regent’s School of Psychotherapy and Psychology at Regent’s University London.  He has a long-standing interest in disseminating psychological ideas through the media, having served for several years as Resident Psychotherapist on BBC Radio 2 and as Spokesperson for the BBC mental health campaign “Life 2 Live”.  In recognition of this work he became Honorary Visiting Professor at the University of Roehampton in 2009 and consultant to the Arts and Humanities Research Council network “Media and the Inner World”.

Susanna Rustin's Profile

Susanna Rustin Related seminars and products

Susanna Rustin is a journalist at the Guardian, and previously worked at the Financial Times. She is currently a leader writer on social affairs, and has also worked as an editor on the Opinion and Review sections. She grew up in London and still lives there with her family. She is also a local campaigner and community councillor.

Margaret Rustin's Profile

Margaret Rustin Related seminars and products

Margaret Rustin was Head of Child Psychotherapy at the Tavistock for many years, and was closely involved in the profession's growth and development in the NHS. She has had many links to Tavistock Relationships, most recently as a trustee during the move to the current premises. Since retiring from the NHS, she continues to teach and supervise in the UK and abroad and has a private clinical practice.  She has written widely about child psychotherapy and psychoanalysis. Her most recent book is Reading Klein, written jointly with her husband, Michael.

Sheila Hollins's Profile

Sheila Hollins Related seminars and products


Sheila Hollins, Baroness Hollins of Wimbledon and Grenoside, South Yorkshire is a professor of the psychiatry of learning disability at St George's, University of London, and was created a crossbench life peer in the House of Lords on 15 November 2010 She was president of the Royal College of Psychiatrists from 2005 to 2008. From 2012 to 2013 she was president of the British Medical Association and was formerly chair of the BMA Board of Science.[6] In 2014 Pope Francis appointed her a member of the newly created Pontifical Commission for the Protection of Minors.[7] The Baroness is also a member of the Scientific Advisory Board of the Centre for Child Protection.

Andrew Balfour's Profile

Andrew Balfour Related seminars and products

Andrew Balfour is Chief Executive at Tavistock Relationships. A former Clinical Psychologist, he is a Couple Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist and an Adult Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist. He worked for many years in the Adult Department of the Tavistock Clinic after completing his training there, and was joint organiser of the course ‘Psychodynamic Approaches to Old Age’. He has a research interest in the area of dementia care and teaches and lectures widely, both in Britain and abroad.

Claire Tyler's Profile

Claire Tyler Related seminars and products

The Baroness Tyler of Enfield

Claire Tyler, Baroness Tyler of Enfield, FAcSS (born 4 June 1957) is a Liberal Democrat life peer in the House of Lords. She became the Chair of CAFCASS (Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service) in February 2012. She is also the President of the NCB(National Children's Bureau), a position she has held since August 2012. She became the Vice-President of Relate in November 2012. Claire chairs the "Make Every Adult Matter" coalition of charities helping adults with multiple needs, is Vice Chair of the Think Ahead Sub Committee overseeing a new adult mental health social work fast track programme and a member of the Advisory Council of Step Up to Serve, which co-ordinates the #iwill campaign. Between 2007 and 2012, she was the chief executive officer of Relate. In the Lords, the Baroness is the Liberal Democrat Spokesperson for Mental Health. She chaired the Values-Based Child and Adolescent Mental Health System Commission which reported in November 2016, in addition to chairing the Lords Select Committee on Financial Exclusion.

Paul Burstow's Profile

Paul Burstow Related seminars and products

Paul Burstow is a social policy entrepreneur and thought leader. He chairs the Social Care Institute for Excellence  and is also a professor of mental health policy at the University of Birmingham. Between 1997 and 2015 he was Liberal Democrat MP for Sutton and Cheam. He served as the minister of state for care services between 2010 and 2012. In the latter role he covered a wide range of social policy issues including mental health, adult social care, carers, personal health budgets, safeguarding, end of life care and long term conditions as well as drafting the Care Act.

Paul is Char of the Tavistock & Portman NHS foundation trust.

Reenee Singh's Profile

Reenee Singh Related seminars and products


Dr Singh is the Founding Director of the London Intercultural Couples Centre and was the editor of the Journal of Family Therapy.  She is also the co-director of the Tavistock Family Therapy and Systemic Research Centre and visiting Professor in the School of Psychology at the University of Bergamo, Italy.

A UKCP accredited systemic psychotherapist with 25 years of clinical experience, she is also  author of two text books and many academic papers.

Currently based at the Child and Family Practice and the London International Practice in central London and seeing clients in Golders Green, North London, Dr. Singh presents research at international conferences and teach cross-cultural therapy and research at universities and training institutions all over the world.

Philip and Carolyn Cowan's Profile

Philip and Carolyn Cowan Related seminars and products

Professor of Psychology Emeritus and Adjunct Professor of Psychology Emerita, University of California, Berkeley, USA

The Cowans are reknowned for designing couples group interventions to strengthen family relationships, guided by a family systems model in which intergenerational attachment patterns and couple relationship quality  provide the contexts in which effective parenting leads to positive cognitive, social, and emotional outcomes for children.This includes the current Parents as Partners internvention, which they devekoped from a US progrmame with Professors Marsha Kline Pruett and Kyle Pruett, delivered by Tavistock Relationships and funded by the Department for Work and Pensions.

Chris Clulow's Profile

Chris Clulow Related seminars and products


Dr Christopher Clulow is a Consultant Couple Psychoanalytic Psychotherapist, registered with the British Psychoanalytic Council, and a Senior Fellow of the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology. He was Director of Tavistock Relationships between 1987 and 2006.

He has published extensively on marriage, partnerships, parenthood and couple psychotherapy, most recently from an attachment perspective. His two edited books in this area are Adult Attachment and Couple Psychotherapy: The ‘Secure Base’ in Practice and Research (2001, Brunner-Routledge) and Attachment, Sex and Couple Psychotherapy: Psychoanalytic Perspectives (2009, Karnac). His most recent co-authored book, Couple Therapy for Depression: A Clinician’s Guide to Integrative Practice, was published by Oxford University Press in 2014 and his co-edited book Engaging Couples: New Directions in Therapeutic Work with Families by Routledge in 2018.

He is a Fellow of the Centre for Social Policy, Dartington, a member of the editorial board of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis, an international editorial consultant for Sexual and Relationship Therapy and a current member of the Scientific Committee of the International Association of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis.  He maintains a clinical and training practice from his home in St Albans and in London.

Stanley Ruszczynski's Profile

Stanley Ruszczynski Related seminars and products

Stanley Ruszczynski is a psychoanalyst (British Psychoanalytic Association) and a psychoanalytic couples psychotherapist. He is a Consultant Adult Psychotherapist at the Portman Clinic (and past Clinic Director, 2005-2016), part of the Tavistock and Portman NHS Foundation Trust. He was a senior member of staff at what is now Tavistock Relationships, 1982-1997 (including Deputy Director, 1987-1993). He has authored a number of journal papers and book chapters, and edited 'Psychotherapy with Couples' (Karnac Books, 1993), with James Fisher, 'Intrusiveness and Intimacy in the Couple' (Karnac Books, 1995) and, with David Morgan, 'Lectures on Violence, Perversion and Delinquency' (Karnac Books, 2007). He teaches and undertakes consultancy in the UK and abroad and has a private clinical practice.

Mary Morgan's Profile

Mary Morgan Related seminars and products

Reader in Couple Psychoanalysis - Tavistock Relationships

Mary joined Tavistock Relationships in 1990. Previously a social worker running a Family Centre in Brixton, she trained as a couple psychoanalytic psychotherapist and then later as a psychoanalyst. She is developing long distance learning at Tavistock Relationships, has published many articles and teaches on couple relationships around the world. 

Susanna Abse's Profile

Susanna Abse Related seminars and products

Susanna Abse is a psychoanalytic psychotherapist who has worked in private practice with couples, parents and individuals since 1991. She was CEO of the charity Tavistock Relationships from 2006 until 2016 and now also works as an Executive Coach and Organisational Consultant. She is an accredited member of the British Psychoanalytic Council and serves as a member of its Executive Board.

Alongside her therapeutic practice, she specialises in conflict resolution; whether that be between separated couples or within organisations where teams and managers have conflicts and unresolved differences which interfere with productive relations.

Susanna is also a Senior Fellow of The Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology; a Fellow of the Centre for Social Policy at Dartington; a Leadership Fellow at St George’s House, Windsor Castle, as well as a Member of the Editorial Board of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis, and Series Co-Editor of “The Library of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis” for Karnac Books. She is currently a member of the policy commission, “Closing the Mental Health Treatment Gap” for the University of Birmingham, examining the best practice based evidence for a new paradigm for mental health that looks to the wider social determinants, adopts assets based approaches and early intervention across the life course.

Previously, she was a member of the Department of Health’s Action for Choice in Therapy Committee, and has sat as an expert advisor on many research and governmental advisory groups; most recently for the NSPCC’s project to develop an early intervention for families at risk of domestic violence. She has published widely on couple therapy, parenting, and family policy and how these areas need to be at the heart of progressive welfare provision, a subject on which she lectures and teaches. Her many publications include writings for the New Statesman and for the Open Society European Policy Institute.

Target Audience

Psychotherapists, Counsellors, Psychologists, Analysts, Social Workers, Academics and all those involved in mental health.



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Total Reviews: 3

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